I Don’t Like to Ask

Do you ask for help? It’s all very well asking for help, but then I’m admitting:

  • others cope
  • others are smarter
  • I’ve failed
  • I’m less than

Really? And what if any of the above was true? Might any of those statements be permanent?

Each and every one of us can benefit from the advice, physical or emotional support at some times in our lives and the best thing is – lots of us like to be asked! It makes us feel good! It can make us feel clever, strong and important – valued, respected and needed!

Unconditioned at birth, from expectations and experiences we happily cry and make it known we need help. Gradually we learn to be independent, to a greater or lesser degree, and then we find something we are unable to do and we hopefully ask help to navigate the challenge.

Inevitably we also make plenty of mistakes because we didn’t ask, and then we learn… and we can see someone else with similar problem/s and choose to help them avoid similar mistakes... then they didn’t have to ask!


Play to your strengths at any given time, and enjoy knowing what you know.


It is also so useful to ‘know what you don’t know’! At any given time in our lives, we enjoy positions of strength and knowledge over our fellow beings. Within these times we are constantly still to learn certain other strengths, this is unique to no one!


Try to resolve what you can so you can learn and grow.


And where you are overwhelmed from time or energy, these are just two examples where asking for help can make the difference and help you avoid the path leading to longer term stress and anxiety, depression, or feelings of low self-esteem.

“I didn’t like to ask”! Really?

If you, or someone you know is feeling overwhelmed by feelings of anxiety or depression, come and see me or write. It won’t hurt to ask!

About the author

Bob Brotchie is a counsellor, mindset consultant and creator of "Conscious Living by Design"™. He writes for Anglia Counselling, is featured on various other websites and introduces us to many guest writers all covering topics related to mental health and wellbeing.

Bob provides bespoke counselling services to individuals and couples in the privacy and comfort of a truly welcoming environment at his Anglia Counselling company office, located near Newmarket in Suffolk, England. Bob also provides professional online counselling, for local, national, and international clients. The therapeutic models offered are bespoke to the client’s needs, especially those in receipt of 'childhood emotional neglect' (CEN), whilst integrating a mindful approach to psychotherapy and cognitive behaviour therapy (CBT) principles. For clients experiencing trauma and/or phobia, Bob offers EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing).